Marion Reardon (1920-2008)

Marion Reardon died on Wednesday, June 26. You won’t see her obituary in any of the mainstream media and certainly her funeral will not be a semi-state occasion like Tim Russert’s. The significance of her life and death is personal to me and especially to her daughter, Maggie, my partner of 20 plus years. During those years I came to know Marion as a woman of considerable talent, accomplishment and determination.

Marion was a single mother beginning in the mid-1960’s, back when that status carried no small amount of social disapproval. She worked hard, raised two fine daughters, and managed to not only hold on to property she purchased with her mother but also to acquire additional property. Maggie describes a childhood of, not poverty, but some financial difficulty. Marion’s strength and determination served her family well during those years. In later years, though, that self-reliance led her to resist any and all attempts to assist her, even as she slowly fell into dementia. She had been on her own so long she was unable to accept any assistance as her physical and mental health declined. Had she been less resistant, perhaps she could have remained in her home rather than (more than reluctantly) move to an assisted living facility.

Since I only new Marion in her last two decades, I had little opportunity to know her as the vibrant person she was. I helped Maggie and her sister clean out the house where Marion lived for some 40 years and saw an immense trove of memorabilia and fine vintage clothing that told me that this sometimes argumentative and difficult older woman had much travel, adventure and ambition in her life. She moved to Phoenix from The Bronx in the late 1940’s, becoming one of the first migrants in Arizona’s post-WWII growth. The city she came to is far different than the one where she died. I’m probably biased but I consider her two daughters to be evidence of a life well lived. She was a Depression-era New Deal Democrat who had no love for any Republican. Even in her final years, as she became increasingly distant from reality, she continued to despise George W. Bush. He mind was going but some reason remained.

Along with the sadness and loss of Marion’s passing, Maggie and I, and probably her sister, too, also feel a sense of relief. Dementia is a particularly difficult disease for all concerned. Marion was confused and angry at the changes in her life. The rest of us were frustrated at the difficulties posed by Marion’s dementia. All that is behind us now. Marion is at peace. We survivors can go on with our lives. Maybe Marion can find George Carlin and the two of them can have a good talk with Tim Russert.

Godspeed, Marion, and thanks for everything.